Camp Cameron 2010 (7)

On Sabbath.

Every Sunday in camp we observed Sabbath.
Sabbath was commanded by God. We cease from what we are working on and rest before God.

In camp, we tried something special.

We had a short service in the morning. Then from 10am to 5pm, we were not supposed to talk to anyone!

The camp site isn't that big. Everywhere we went we meet people. Not to talk? No activity? Do what?

We were given a few questions to reflect on what we had learned during the week. What God had been speaking to me this week? What we had jot down during talks and no time to ponder.

Every Sabbath when I looked into my notes to examine my relationships, my heart went very heavy.

I opened my note book. When I wanted to look at what I had written during the week regarding my own relationships, I felt the reluctance in my heart. I wanted to close the note book and go to sleep.

But I knew I should not run away anymore.
I need to be honest to myself.
When any problem arose, I just pushed the thoughts aside.

When I needed to look at my relationships with my family members, I wanted to close the notebook.
I prayed hard. GOD!!!!
I got no strength to go on.
I opened the notebook and thought the relationships over, where they need to be mended. Pray and submit to God.

When I needed to look into my relationships with friends, I felt the same reluctance again.
Same went to my relationships.
I always liked to show people as if I had been healed from all pains.
I like to tell my own sad stories without emotion, as if it is not my own.

Now, I am learning to be honest to myself.
It is bad enough not to be fake before other people, it is even worse to tell lies to yourself.

If you are happy, show it. Don't be afraid that people will be offended.
If you are sad, it is OK to cry.
If you love someone, don't show as if you don't care.

I realised I don't allow myself to feel sad, happy, angry and all.
I always tried to be neutral.
Emotionless.

Oh Athens, be true to yourself.